5 Things That Help Build My Confidence
17th December 2016Lately I’ve felt really down on myself, and it’s totally shattered my confidence. It’s ridiculous really, because things are going better than ever in every way, yet still I feel totally inadequate and kinda crappy. I think as a blogger, it’s probably a little more common to feel this way than it should be. If you’re a blogger/vlogger too; you’ll know that unfortunately you can get dragged into this whole world of comparison, and it can eat away at you leaving only feelings of doubt.
I’m pretty damn sick of it though.
It holds me back, affects how I interact with others, and leaves me questioning my own abilities. Whether it’s something ridiculous, like wondering why I don’t get the same opportunities as others, or feeling like I can’t wear a pretty dress I love; I’m constantly letting my self esteem run so low that I’m not being myself.
So with this in mind, I came up with a little list of things that I know are fool proof ways to boost my confidence. I thought I’d share it with you guys, in the hopes it might inspire one or two of you too! Obviously this list is catered to what helps me, but feel free to let me know what helps YOU in the comments 🙂
1. Being grateful for the things I have – Making a little mental note of all the good that surrounds my life is so good for the soul! I’ve now dedicated a page in my journal to all the wonderful things I have to be grateful for. Like my family, friends, blogger pals, doing something I love for a job, a lovely home, etc. This helps to instantly lift my mood, and in turn makes me feel more confident about who I am, and what I’m doing. I have a few friends who have broken up with their partners recently too, and they’ve been so grateful in being able to organise an online divorce which helps them move on to a new life quickly and easily.
2. Taking note of things I like about myself – This one is MUCH, much harder for me. But I’m *trying*, I really am. I have a little post it note of things I like about myself above my desk, so it’s always reminding me, and this helps! I’m also trying to step out of my comfort zone with fashion and beauty, by telling myself I’m worth it (cue Loreal advert). I finally wore my black tulle skirt this week, which I’ve been admiring in my closet for SIX MONTHS. It’s beautiful, and princessy, and terrifying to me. Having my legs out, even a little bit, scared me into never actually wearing it. But I finally forced myself this week, and I’m so so glad!
3. Working on my skills – Is there anything better for confidence than working on something you KNOW you rock at? Being able to throw your hands up and cheer for yourself about a piece of work, or a particular skill is awesome. I thoroughly recommend delving into anything you know you have a knack for, as a confidence booster.
4. Taking time out – Closing the laptop, hiding my phone, and taking a night or two off work is an INSTANT help for my own confidence. As someone who lives online, I can tell you that after a while those ‘perfect Instagram people’ and those awesome bloggers knocking out new ideas all the time; CAN get to me. It can make me curl into a ball and tell myself I’m nowhere near as good. Getting away from all that, distancing myself from the things that trigger that confidence nose dive for me, is essential. A good book, a walk, hanging with friends always helps.
5. Accomplishing something new – When you take on a new project/skill/challenge; it can be an amazing boost for your confidence. Showing yourself you can still take on new things and rock it, you’ll feel better about yourself than ever. I have some new projects in the works, and I’m feeling more confident already!
Do you guys have anything that always helps your confidence?
Let me know!
I love these tips! When I’m feeling low on confidence I always like to do something I really love doing and know I can be successful at, especially if it’s something I’ve found difficult in the past like going to the gym or for a run. Reminding myself of what I’m good and and have accomplished is always a real boost.
I’m sorry you’ve been feeling down on yourself lately – I hope you start to feel happier and more confident soon. We’re all rooting for you!
Lx | Lightly We Go
These are some great tips! I have a journal which I use to write down things that I like about myself or things that I’m good at. When I’m feeling bad about myself I read it and it helps me to realise how awesome I actually am haha!
http://www.eleaanormay.com
These are really good tips! My confidence is at an all time low, and i definitely agree that going offline does hugely help. Comparison is the killer of confidence and its definitely something thats really hard to build back up when its been knocked down xx
Abi | abistreetx
Lovely post! I always try to talk to myself I would to a friend, then I feel I’m far kinder on myself xx
Since I have been house bound the past 2 years it has really knocked my confidence. I find taking time out and realising what good is in your life definitely helps. I also find when I find clothes that fit how I want them makes me feel more confident.
EmmysBeautyCave | Blog Header Designs | GIVEAWAY Win Anastasia Beverly Hills & More
I’m genuinely rejoicing that you wore the skirt you love! Get those pins out girl!!
@ZoeAdel
This things are really great for building confidence. I found that what really helps me is looking in the mirror and instead of saying the things I hate, say the things I love, like my eyes, my arms (as weird as it may sound) and I feel so much better after that. And of course, a good outfit always make me feel good haha.
http://www.blossomikebana.com
I love this post! I have so many days where my confidence levels are just at an all time low, especially lately, so I really needed to read this. I too have a page in my journal to write down what I’m grateful for – it’s such a great little thing to do every day, isn’t it?? P.s. You’re amazing and I’m sending you so much love!
– Erin (www.poppiesinoctober.co.uk) <3
This is an amazing post I really enjoyed reading it x and I totally get what you mean there are just some days when I’m really feeling down about myself and these things are very helpful x sometimes I like to take an internet break too and just shut down my phone and laptop and just watch a movie or read and drink tea xx
Really loved this post honey, it really helps people like myself to realise that we are not alone with the same/similar thoughts and experiences!
I for 1 have definitely suffered with confidence ALL my life and come to terms with (at my age) that I probably always will, but in saying that posts like this really do help in a massive way to know like I said that I am not alone.
I too keep trying to push myself to be more confident but unfortunately so far nothing has worked. I’m hoping 1 day my confidence will grow and become even a tiny bit better.
I love reading your posts hun, you are such an inspirational person and I KNOW many in the Blogging world will agree.
LisaXoX
I totally agree with all of these posts! Especially being grateful for what you have… I keep comparing myself to other people but I should focus on the amazing things I already have and be happy with it.
Lizzie Bee // mysticthorn.com
You know how much I lack confidence so this is a great post for me to read!! The first one is difficult for me sometimes with my depression but I really want to aim to be grateful for the positives I DO have and not what I don’t! I LOVE YOU! I’LL BUILD YOUR CONFIDENCE!! <3333
Dee | PromptsbyDee xoxo
You have the best personality ever, a group of friends who love you, passion for your hobbies and skills, and the ability to bring a smile wherever you go! x
I’m definitely guilty of comparing myself to others and I often forget about the good things I have achieved. Taking time out always helps 🙂 I also think you’re a pretty amazing human and even though it’s hard, you should believe in yourself! xx
Jessie | allthingsbeautiful-x
Aww thanks Jessie! I suppose we all have those moments at some time or another, its hard though! x
This might be a bit of a cliché, but I find blogging helps my confidence. When I was younger I was quite shy and I wasn’t very good at talking to people and expressing myself. By writing in the blogging world it has given me more confidence and taught me how to get my voice heard in my day to day life. And I agree, you should always believe in yourself and be happy. Life is too short after all xx
Blogging really does help me sometimes, it can make me feel like I have my own established and welcoming place for the most part! 🙂 x
So sorry to hear you have been feeling unconfident lately! One thing you should remember is how many people admire you and your blog, which will hopefully help boost you a little. I totally agree that working on a skill you have or just having a few no internet days are good ways to take a step back and realize you do have worth and do have talents!
Angi http://www.twodifferentworlds.com
Sounds really soppy but my fiancé makes me feel confident. He has a way of knowing the exact thing to say when I’m feeling crappy about myself. And for some reason he loves all the things about me that I hate.
I love this post, weirdly I like to read these kinds of things…proves that not everyone thinks everything is perfect.
Katie | https://katieameliaxo.blogspot.co.uk
I love this list! It is so good. Jemma, you’re trying – I’ve only been following you for a little while and I can tell. Even though it might feel like you’re still struggling with the same issues, there’s only two ways this can go: you stop trying and nothing happens (or you can feel worse), or you keep trying and get closer to where you want to be. You see, it’s not a matter of “if” it will happen, it’s a matter of “when”! And if you remind yourself every day of that, you will be unstoppable. As a therapist, I can honestly tell you that it ALWAYS takes time to change our mindset. We’re only human, and we’re all works in progress. What matters most is that we continue to believe in ourselves and grow our capacity. You’re on the right track. x
– E
http://www.holaitserica.com
Lovely list, Jemma. I often feel the same as you described – I think as bloggers it can be really difficult. We are constantly comparing ourselves against others and finding ourselves coming up short. I’ll definitely take a leaf out of your page from now on and try some your tips! x http://www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk x
Lovely tips! It’s definitely important to take time for yourself. I really like the idea of accomplishing something new to give you a boost, too!
Y x | The Sweet Seven Five
Things that make me feel confident include surrounding myself with positive people, being appreciated and feeling proud of my skills, talents and achievements.
Chichi
chichi-writes.blogspot.co.uk
I feel like working on my skills is the most important one for me. I can truly relate to this. I have a little blogpost up about confidence and makeup. http://lisawinckelmans.com/how-i-get-a-little-bit-more-confidence/
XOXO Lisa